[ a "no" almost slips from him. he glances to owain's throat, then away. best not to stress owain too much right now, especially if his voice is still hoarse enough to speak this softly
a quick nod before he takes a seat ] Your voice seems... quiet. Have you been resting your throat properly?
This... isn't what I had in mind, originally. I was planning something more grandiose, but changes [ a small glance upwards at the ENDLESS VOID OF BLACKNESS ] and events changed what I planned, what I wanted to do. I know what I need to do now.
[ a deep breath ]
When I was being choked, the first two people who came to mind were Mother and Father, how I wanted to see them one more time. I wanted to play with Mother and train with Father, one last time.
And then, I thought of someone else. I thought of you, Gerome, and how there were so many things I wanted to say to you, how I couldn't go without saying them to you.
[ this is not at all what he was prepared for. he listens quietly, dutifully, and the only movement he makes is the rise and fall of his chest as he breathes. at least until owain seems to finish this part—and it does appear to only be one part—of his speech. ]
... Then we both have much to say. [ he hesitates before slowly reaching up and removing his mask. he sets uncertainly it to the side ] Perhaps this will make things easier.
Edited (i edit compulsively, its a problem) 2018-12-11 00:34 (UTC)
[ he watches, face flushing when gerome reaches up to remove his mask. this is more than he's been allowed to see in quite some time-- different from the other day, when they were patching each other up from their sparring match. he's only quiet for a moment, eyes just tracing every exposed inch of his face before he continues. ]
You've been by my side, for as long as I could remember. In spite of our differences, there's no one else I could trust more to be there for me when I need them. There's more... more about you that I need to learn, that I want to learn, but I don't want to do it as we are now.
[ meeting owain's direct gaze is much harder than he expected. he can't help the way his face heats up at the scrutiny but he at least refuses to look away. he offered this—and gods, he almost regrets it—so he's not going to back down. ]
Are you sure about this? By now, you should at least realize how difficult I can be. I... may not always understand you, and that may lead us to fight. You deserve far better than that.
[ not looking away, but he's definitely reaching for gerome's hand, lacing their fingers together. ]
I've never been more sure of anything. We're not the easiest, for anybody. I may not always understand you either, but I'm willing to fight with you, if it ends with us getting closer.
[ he doesn't fight it, there would be no point in it. he gives follows owain's lead and then gives his hand a firm squeeze. ]
Then I won't ask again, nor will I doubt you. [ after all, he started watching owain because he was hard to understand. because he wasn't easy. he leans closer, letting their foreheads touch. ] All I ask is you stay by my side through every fight and every hardship. In return, I promise to treat you as kindly as I can. To try and be deserving of every moment of your affection.
[ his face breaks out in a bright smile there, he leans in as well, letting their foreheads press against each other. ]
I promise to stay by your side from now into our unforeseen future. I will give you my strength and aid whenever you need it. I will treasure your kindness, but even more so, treasure your insults, because you say them because you care for me.
You've done more than enough to be deserving of all my affection.
You truly are a fool in love. [ owain would have to be blind to think him fitting, but. just this once he'll overlook it. he pulls back just enough to have space to carefully remove his glove and slide the ring from his finger.
[ holding owain's hand as if it's something sacred and sliding the ring onto his finger. he rubs his thumb fondly over owain's knuckles before holding his own hand out. ]
[ owain is vibrating with excitement at this. he's looking at gerome's ring on his finger for a moment before he takes gerome's hand in his. just reverently, he's sliding the ring onto his finger.
then he raises gerome's hand and presses a brief kiss to the ring on his finger ]
... It may take some time to get used to this. [ he's never received too much physical affection outside of minerva's cuddling. or if he has, he doesn't remember it. he doesn't pull away though, instead he tries to move his hand to stroke owain's cheek. ]
Then let's be sure to practice diligently. Together. [ dropping his hand down to take owain's again. this is a good start, a very good, very pleasant start.
fondly looking down at their hands and then looking up with a sterner expression. sorry, he's back to being serious now. ] We've wasted too much time idling in the courtyard. We're engaged now, we must go tell Minervykins. And tend to your neck.
... Letting her maul you will only encourage her to misbehave. Let's make a stop at the kitchen. If we bring her a treat she'll be in a more temperate mood.
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a quick nod before he takes a seat ] Your voice seems... quiet. Have you been resting your throat properly?
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[ a distinct pause ]
I wanted to save it for right now. [ for you ]
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[ a question, really, but he wants to say this, without pause or interruption ]
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[ a deep breath ]
When I was being choked, the first two people who came to mind were Mother and Father, how I wanted to see them one more time. I wanted to play with Mother and train with Father, one last time.
And then, I thought of someone else. I thought of you, Gerome, and how there were so many things I wanted to say to you, how I couldn't go without saying them to you.
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... Then we both have much to say. [ he hesitates before slowly reaching up and removing his mask. he sets uncertainly it to the side ] Perhaps this will make things easier.
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You've been by my side, for as long as I could remember. In spite of our differences, there's no one else I could trust more to be there for me when I need them. There's more... more about you that I need to learn, that I want to learn, but I don't want to do it as we are now.
I want there to be something more between us.
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Are you sure about this? By now, you should at least realize how difficult I can be. I... may not always understand you, and that may lead us to fight. You deserve far better than that.
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I've never been more sure of anything. We're not the easiest, for anybody. I may not always understand you either, but I'm willing to fight with you, if it ends with us getting closer.
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Then I won't ask again, nor will I doubt you. [ after all, he started watching owain because he was hard to understand. because he wasn't easy. he leans closer, letting their foreheads touch. ] All I ask is you stay by my side through every fight and every hardship. In return, I promise to treat you as kindly as I can. To try and be deserving of every moment of your affection.
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I promise to stay by your side from now into our unforeseen future. I will give you my strength and aid whenever you need it. I will treasure your kindness, but even more so, treasure your insults, because you say them because you care for me.
You've done more than enough to be deserving of all my affection.
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holding out his hand for owain's. ] May I?
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If you allow me the same honor.
[ placing his hand in gerome's ]
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[ holding owain's hand as if it's something sacred and sliding the ring onto his finger. he rubs his thumb fondly over owain's knuckles before holding his own hand out. ]
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then he raises gerome's hand and presses a brief kiss to the ring on his finger ]
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fondly looking down at their hands and then looking up with a sterner expression. sorry, he's back to being serious now. ] We've wasted too much time idling in the courtyard. We're engaged now, we must go tell Minervykins. And tend to your neck.
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I'm sure Minerva will be excited to see this development.
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You should tell me of the things you said.
[ standing up, still holding his hand ]
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You won't like it. [ a guilty pause. ] And Minerva may try to bite you, too.
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